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What's Happening in your Everyday Life; Random Thread spinoff to keep stuff about members' everyday stuff and first-world problems separate from random content
Topic Started: Jan 15 2013, 12:41 PM (6,511 Views)
GothicCarsUrban
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SUV
funeralxempire
Jan 30 2013, 12:36 AM
GothicCarsUrban
Jan 30 2013, 12:05 AM
Reevaluation was stressful, I had a wakeup call that the young lady I have been chatting with has been using me to cheat on the boyfriend she was supposedly trying to get away from, so I cut off contact with her, I get the last thing involved with my old house (notifying about the numerous roof leaks, window leaks, unsafe appliances, rotted wood and other things, and turning in keys/terminating my contract) tomorrow along with therapy... will be glad for January to end at last.
I know you might be upset over the situation with the girl, but it might be worthwhile to consider maintaining some sort of contact as friends or at least acquaintances. After all, girls are social creatures, knowing one leads to knowing multiple and if things don't work out as you wish with one, they have friends, sometimes these friends are better and more compatible.

Wow, I'm such a hypocrite, I should have taken this exact advice 15 months ago. :(
Good idea. Only problem is distance, she's down in Ashland and doesn't know anyone here. But I will take that advice.
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jedimario
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RAWR
Or just make it clear that while she is with someone else you are only interested in being platonic friends. "Boyfriend" is temporary. But if she'd try to cheat on one guy....
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Dragnet_Supporter
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jedimario
Jan 30 2013, 08:09 AM
Or just make it clear that while she is with someone else you are only interested in being platonic friends. "Boyfriend" is temporary. But if she'd try to cheat on one guy....
Jedi makes a very good point. Cheaters are quite likely to be the ones who come running to you when the current BF finds out their ways and dumps them. Then you become rebound guy, used and tossed out once they feel comforted enough to move on, or someone else catches their eye...which could be within the next five minutes.

I don't like to judge, but people who juggle multiple partners/date-worthy prospects end up with a great deal of either confusion (trying to decide) or ego (because they love all the attention too much). It would be okay if they were up front about it and allowed you to do the same, or move on if that type of situation wasn't what you are looking for. But no, lies become part of the relationship right away. And this is a deal breaker for me.

Sorry to hear the eval was stressful. But that's pretty much par for the course in such things. They want to push and see how you react. Frankly, there are no wrong answers here, merely matters of perception. And I perceive you are moving forward. The factoids you've listed here yourself is pretty conclusive evidence of that. So continue to create your own joy. Sure, it's great to have a GF, but to my thinking, the more you move along your own path, plotting the kind of life you want, doing the things you love, will eventually bring you into contact with someone you will have things in common with. It can take time, certainly. But to quote a bit of philosophy here, the garden you seek to grow has to be tended to before it can bear fruit. It might simply be that you need to focus on yourself, your own needs. Picture the kind of person you'd really want to meet, then make yourself the kind of person your mental image girl could fall in love with.

That sort of thinking can be expanded into anything you wish to achieve. And it all starts with loving yourself, and your life. In other words, you need to be a little selfish right now--but in a good, nurturing way.
Edited by Dragnet_Supporter, Jan 30 2013, 12:31 PM.
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W_Body_Geek
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Dragnet's advice is the best I have seen so far in years. Well-written words; that mark of a true wise person :)
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GothicCarsUrban
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Good points. Dragnet, you are probably the board's resident advice guy now. :)
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W_Body_Geek
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Inb4 "Dragnet's Advice Column"
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GothicCarsUrban
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W_Body_Geek
Jan 31 2013, 02:59 AM
Inb4 "Dragnet's Advice Column"
LOL
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Dragnet_Supporter
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LOL! I've spent my life observing, first as an artist, then (more recently) as a writer. I think I turned towards writing because I've been through my share of unpleasant situations. The fact that I've recently gotten more heavily into the writing seems to bring all this stuff out of me. So thank you for the kind words. I'll take them as encouragement and confirmation that I am on my own correct path to a better future

Life is a big boat, and the din can be confusing sometimes. But we are all really sailing toward the same shore :)
Edited by Dragnet_Supporter, Jan 31 2013, 08:01 AM.
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SLWPAR
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GCU, wow!! That's a nice place and impressive. It's simple and cozy, just the way it should be! I like the cars everywhere too. Wish I could do that here but the girl would flip if I moved her decorations. :\ lol
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Scooter
Fullsize
another long night of paid ems

thurs 7p-7a
fri 11a-7p
fri 7p-7a
sat 7p-7a
sun 11a-7p
sun 7p-7a (right now )
mon 10a-6p

last week was 57 hrs this looks like 67 hrs. looks like in 2 weeks 80hrs regular and 44hr overtime
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GothicCarsUrban
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SLO-MARO
Feb 3 2013, 09:39 PM
GCU, wow!! That's a nice place and impressive. It's simple and cozy, just the way it should be! I like the cars everywhere too. Wish I could do that here but the girl would flip if I moved her decorations. :\ lol
Thanks! I just put in proper storage for my records, and my ex would have started throwing and stomping diecasts if I even thought of putting them out like that, most of them were in shoe bins or their original boxes in the back bedroom at the old place. I still have to get the rest of my small-scales into 100-count Tara cases.

There's a reason that no one on the internet ever saw what the inside of my old place looked like, and that's because it was a crumbling wreck with damage that my ex-landlord refused to do anything about and is now asking me to cough up $250 along with forfeiting my security deposit on, they even sent a collection agency out after my ex to get her to cover the rest of the damage.
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daniel60
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I have to qualify with my Glock 22 tomorrow and I'm nervous. I did so much better with the 357 magnum. The Glock has a lot of recoil however it is better than the Smith and Wesson 40 caliber. Please say a prayer for the old man.
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jedimario
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RAWR
Just take as much time as you're allowed between each shot to get set again!
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Firehawk73
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Well, where do I begin....LOL Right now for the next week I am on a online defensive driving course to take care of a speed trap speeding ticket. That really sucks. My father in law passed away last month and though the funeral is over, the grieving is just began for my wife. On top of that he did not leave a will and there has been problems in the family as for as his assests go. Hopefully that will work itself out once everyone gets their bearing back.

The job has giving us a new skill base program to increase our knowledge and also to increase in position and pay. The only thing is that I have to learn stuff that is below my pay grade to keep what I already have. Some of the stuff is something I have never done the whole 10 years that I have been there and some stuff I know I can't do and not willing to learn because its only going backwards for me to do so. The program is setup for everybody to do everybody's job. I having been honing my skills for the position I am in right now and the step above my pay grade. I don't want to waste time going back when I could be going forward. If not completed before the end of this year. My pay is going to be reduced but still expected to perform the same job. It appears I will be leaving this job at the end of this year for another. Its time for change. I rather be graded on my performance and knowledge not just knowledge. We have too many knowledgable people but lazy is all get out.

I also need to go to the doctor for my lack of luster in my step. I feel drained most of the time but I think that might be the lack of sleep. Baby Nick is not sleeping the whole night through and it is putting a strain on me and the wife. Jacob is the only one in the house that gets a full night sleep. He sleeps through anything....LOL

I might be also looking for another car or get the Monte fixed. I don't know because I don't really want to spend anymore money on the Monte Carlo. Its 12 years old and I have to get something more dependable with four doors. I just have to figure something out because there is no room in the budget for the moment for another car or car payment.

I know this post in not a whole lot of positive things going on. Its just that we are going through a rough patch and all the emotions that come with it and the top it off. I don't get to spend to much time with the wife because of our work schedule. I just have to take it one day at a time and get through this. This rough patch will soon pass and just have to get through it. I wish it would hurry the frac up and get over already.....LOL

My family and keeping things together is a chore but I would not trade it for anything. My sons make me laugh everyday especially when Baby Nick is playing with Jacob and Jacob is not to keen on the ideal of Nick playing with his toys......LOL I have to say that they get along alot better than me and my brother did.....LOL
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GothicCarsUrban
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Hope everything goes well for Daniel and Paul. :)

@Paul: Sorry about your father-in-law.

And for me... I will have a new urban exploration opportunity soon and will probably have 3,000 comments by my one-year Garage birthday.
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jedimario
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RAWR
Paul, sorry to hear about your troubles. 11 months is a long time to go job-hunting, just push through it and you will make it I'm sure. Hope things get better soon!
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daniel60
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Personal Luxury Car
Paul I'm sorry for your death in the family and your job troubles that is why you aren't sleeping well. Life is hard man sometimes and sleeping just doesn't happen. Have you ever took herbs to help you sleep? I take them and they do seem to help. When I was your age my daughter had a problem with her milk formula and that gave us a hard time. We eventually tried them all and found one. Try to think positive and keep praying to God you will make it through this thing. Please I don't mean to sound like a Father but don't leave a job that doesn't pay better. I have been at my current job for 23 years and I don't much like it but when you weigh one for the other I just stay because the pay is decent and I can retire in five years. Ten years is a long time you have with that company.
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funeralxempire
SUV
daniel60
Feb 5 2013, 08:35 PM
Have you ever took herbs to help you sleep? I take them and they do seem to help.
This is good advice, and there's several options available.

Valerian root is a good sleep aid, as is melatonin.
5-HTP isn't quite a sleep aid, but many people find it does assist with falling asleep, and it also tends to give you quite vivid dreams and can help boost your mood too (tryptophan is metabolized into serotonin, serotonin is a neurotransmitter important for mood regulation).

Since these all work on separate mechanisms they can be safely combined. Avoid 5-HTP if you're taking anti-depressants though. And, the usual disclaimer to consult with your doctor before taking anything.
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daniel60
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Dragnet_Supporter
Jan 31 2013, 07:45 AM
LOL! I've spent my life observing, first as an artist, then (more recently) as a writer. I think I turned towards writing because I've been through my share of unpleasant situations. The fact that I've recently gotten more heavily into the writing seems to bring all this stuff out of me. So thank you for the kind words. I'll take them as encouragement and confirmation that I am on my own correct path to a better future

Life is a big boat, and the din can be confusing sometimes. But we are all really sailing toward the same shore :)
Wow very beautifully said. You are no doubt a writer but with those kind of words you are better than just an average writer. I qualified today it took me twice but I was spared . Gosh I have got to start practicing but the funny thing is I'm not even into weapons. I'm mean don't get me wrong but weapons I have no interest in. The mean part my wife says I am. She says I'm the most selfish, self-centered ass there is. Oh well I'm happily married. Learn from me you young guys take your time I'm on my second wife now .
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Dragnet_Supporter
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Paul: it sounds like you have a lot going on. But I'm glad you allowed yourself the time to let off some steam in your post. In reading it, my impression was that lack of rest and a new mouth to feed are causing you undo pressure. This has been compounded by your job, as during times like that, anything that makes the extra demand on your time gets blown into twice the size in your head, giving you the feeling that your already busy schedule just can't take any more and sustain itself--or yourself, which is really where the problem lies.

When we scatter our energies over several situations (and the people that comprise those situations) we drain our batteries very quickly. We feel it's all demanding we expend that energy now, immediatly, leaving nothing left for ourselves. Consequently, we race in around in a state of perpetual fatique, crankiness, and we don't think straight about any of it.

As stated in some of the above posts, life doesn't make us, we make life. And this is true whether we are consciously feeling in control, or just running on auto-pilot.

Find a quiet space in your day. Or, if that isn't possible, do it at night when everyone else is asleep. You say you aren't sleeping anyway, so you might as well make better use of the time. relax and breath deeply. This isn't just meditation mumbo-jumbo advice. When we are frantic, our breathing becomes more shallow, robbing our system of proper oxygen intake and perpetuating the drained state we've gotten ourselves into.

As you breath, mentally picture your scattered energies being pulled back to you--like invisible tendrils recoiling. Listen to the sound of your breathing and allow no other thoughts to enter your head for 10-15 minutes. When you feel your mind straying, bring it back to your breathing.

Afterward, you may feel relaxed enough to sleep. But you might also want to review exactly what's at the heart of the problem by asking yourself some mental questions about each of the circumstances and seeing which one makes you feel most anxious. My feeling here is that you are going to end up on one side of your job, or the other by the end of this. Either the notion of the lack of a job, or less pay, thus not being able to provide for your family. Or it may be that you don't really care about the job, and feel you are hopelessly clinging to something that's making you miserable due playing it safe for the family.

Your words seem to be tangling work and family into a knot you can't quite see your way to unraveling. Why are we always so anxious to see our choices as either good or bad? Either you take the year to find something else, if the problem is the job being a drudgery--the old saying about it being easier to find a job when you already have one is true. And if you decide the problem really isn't that you hate your job, then you need to work out some type of schedule with your family (if things don't adjust themselves soon) where you can take a little time to get your head clear, then buckle down and learn whatever your job requires of you.

If neither of those choices work for you, find one that does. We become so tied to living the life that everyone says is required of us. We buy into fear due to the economic changes. All of which cause mental constpation, then stagnation. Boredom is death on a stale cracker, served without a beverage.

A rich man once told me that I would get nowhere doing the work of others for little pay. He said I needed to find my own thing while I was doing my current job and work two extra hour per day learning it, developing, until I could make it happen for myself.

A poor man told me not to follow my dreams, that the best I could hope for was to work towards some type of city, or government job where I might make a steady salary. He suggested a postal worker as having a steady future...and where are all those jobs going today?

Some questions to consider: If we could do what we wanted for a living, what would it be? What would it take to become the type of person who does that type of work? If we could only spare an hour or two per day in working toward this goal, how could we trim our schedule in order to fit it in?

Most of us spend longer than that watching the news--listening to the media convince us it's useless to try anything because the world as we know it might end a hundred different ways. Yet we all seem to jump on that notion of keeping informed don't we? Informed of what? How your neighbor might be a murderer, a terrorist? Or that every meal you eat might consist of a food that could kill you? Or maybe you just like the political soap opera so much that you can't live without it. Or the need to hear if anyone got blown up in the Middle East, murdered in NYC, LA, or some other catastrophe that usurps our faith in humanity.

Wake up America. Whose life is it anyway?

The rich and greedy aren't going to blow up the planet because there's no profit if we all die. The rumors or armegeddon are greatly exagerated. They can, however, make anything you choose to believe into a kind of twisted religion--all based on great wrath if we don't obey the rules.

Have we the right to still call ourselves man-kind, or would the term man-cattle fit a society that is no longer able to think for themselves. Isn't it amazing how we worry daily about our freedoms being taken away, then invite hoplessness into our living-rooms each night and give it more time and attention than most of us spend in a lifetime in terms of defining what would set us free on a personal level. We have met the enemy...and it has ever been us.

Okay, that may have turned into a bit more of a rant than I intended. But somewhere between the lines, we can all find ourselves, playing the starring role in the movie of our own lives--but is it the director's vision, or our own?

Edited by Dragnet_Supporter, Feb 6 2013, 06:03 PM.
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gregac124
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For the past couple of months I've been getting my house ready for sale.
It never really felt like the right place and a couple of years ago it got badly damaged in a freak hail storm.
I've been patiently waiting for 5 years to pass before moving on because it cost me over a years wages in fees and stamp duty last time I changed homes.
Anyway it scrubbed up well and seems to be getting a fair bit of buyer interest so hopefully I'll be moving on soon.
Here's the link to it...

http://www.realestate.com.au/property-townhouse-vic-kensington-112891119

Cheers Greg
Edited by gregac124, Feb 6 2013, 06:25 PM.
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Scooter
Fullsize
Whats happening in the every day life here.

Helping parents with bills for the time being. which puts my life on hold mainly. I tell ya coming here and buying and trading keeps me saine on that front. Half my check goes to them before i see my own bills. When you cant really do what you want or should be able to be doing it takes alot out of ya and bothers you to no end. I got my rooms packed so when i can go im gonna be going with both rear tires spinning.

Outside of that, just sorting and stacking up die casts. Trying to land some displays that would be nice. 2 more gas stations a police and a fire station would be mighty nice. Oh well.
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Firehawk73
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Dragnet_Supporter
Feb 6 2013, 06:00 PM
Paul: it sounds like you have a lot going on. But I'm glad you allowed yourself the time to let off some steam in your post. In reading it, my impression was that lack of rest and a new mouth to feed are causing you undo pressure. This has been compounded by your job, as during times like that, anything that makes the extra demand on your time gets blown into twice the size in your head, giving you the feeling that your already busy schedule just can't take any more and sustain itself--or yourself, which is really where the problem lies.

When we scatter our energies over several situations (and the people that comprise those situations) we drain our batteries very quickly. We feel it's all demanding we expend that energy now, immediatly, leaving nothing left for ourselves. Consequently, we race in around in a state of perpetual fatique, crankiness, and we don't think straight about any of it.

As stated in some of the above posts, life doesn't make us, we make life. And this is true whether we are consciously feeling in control, or just running on auto-pilot.

Find a quiet space in your day. Or, if that isn't possible, do it at night when everyone else is asleep. You say you aren't sleeping anyway, so you might as well make better use of the time. relax and breath deeply. This isn't just meditation mumbo-jumbo advice. When we are frantic, our breathing becomes more shallow, robbing our system of proper oxygen intake and perpetuating the drained state we've gotten ourselves into.

As you breath, mentally picture your scattered energies being pulled back to you--like invisible tendrils recoiling. Listen to the sound of your breathing and allow no other thoughts to enter your head for 10-15 minutes. When you feel your mind straying, bring it back to your breathing.

Afterward, you may feel relaxed enough to sleep. But you might also want to review exactly what's at the heart of the problem by asking yourself some mental questions about each of the circumstances and seeing which one makes you feel most anxious. My feeling here is that you are going to end up on one side of your job, or the other by the end of this. Either the notion of the lack of a job, or less pay, thus not being able to provide for your family. Or it may be that you don't really care about the job, and feel you are hopelessly clinging to something that's making you miserable due playing it safe for the family.

Your words seem to be tangling work and family into a knot you can't quite see your way to unraveling. Why are we always so anxious to see our choices as either good or bad? Either you take the year to find something else, if the problem is the job being a drudgery--the old saying about it being easier to find a job when you already have one is true. And if you decide the problem really isn't that you hate your job, then you need to work out some type of schedule with your family (if things don't adjust themselves soon) where you can take a little time to get your head clear, then buckle down and learn whatever your job requires of you.

If neither of those choices work for you, find one that does. We become so tied to living the life that everyone says is required of us. We buy into fear due to the economic changes. All of which cause mental constpation, then stagnation. Boredom is death on a stale cracker, served without a beverage.

A rich man once told me that I would get nowhere doing the work of others for little pay. He said I needed to find my own thing while I was doing my current job and work two extra hour per day learning it, developing, until I could make it happen for myself.

A poor man told me not to follow my dreams, that the best I could hope for was to work towards some type of city, or government job where I might make a steady salary. He suggested a postal worker as having a steady future...and where are all those jobs going today?

Some questions to consider: If we could do what we wanted for a living, what would it be? What would it take to become the type of person who does that type of work? If we could only spare an hour or two per day in working toward this goal, how could we trim our schedule in order to fit it in?

Most of us spend longer than that watching the news--listening to the media convince us it's useless to try anything because the world as we know it might end a hundred different ways. Yet we all seem to jump on that notion of keeping informed don't we? Informed of what? How your neighbor might be a murderer, a terrorist? Or that every meal you eat might consist of a food that could kill you? Or maybe you just like the political soap opera so much that you can't live without it. Or the need to hear if anyone got blown up in the Middle East, murdered in NYC, LA, or some other catastrophe that usurps our faith in humanity.

Wake up America. Whose life is it anyway?

The rich and greedy aren't going to blow up the planet because there's no profit if we all die. The rumors or armegeddon are greatly exagerated. They can, however, make anything you choose to believe into a kind of twisted religion--all based on great wrath if we don't obey the rules.

Have we the right to still call ourselves man-kind, or would the term man-cattle fit a society that is no longer able to think for themselves. Isn't it amazing how we worry daily about our freedoms being taken away, then invite hoplessness into our living-rooms each night and give it more time and attention than most of us spend in a lifetime in terms of defining what would set us free on a personal level. We have met the enemy...and it has ever been us.

Okay, that may have turned into a bit more of a rant than I intended. But somewhere between the lines, we can all find ourselves, playing the starring role in the movie of our own lives--but is it the director's vision, or our own?

I like to thank all of you that commented to my post and offered advice and I, especially like to thank Dragnet for the lengthy comment and part essay...LOL By the way I never watch the news its depressing.....LOL I will get through this. I just have to tackle each problem and deal with it one day at a time with the Good Lord help of course.
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Firehawk73
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Scooter
Feb 6 2013, 06:32 PM
Whats happening in the every day life here.

Helping parents with bills for the time being. which puts my life on hold mainly. I tell ya coming here and buying and trading keeps me saine on that front. Half my check goes to them before i see my own bills. When you cant really do what you want or should be able to be doing it takes alot out of ya and bothers you to no end. I got my rooms packed so when i can go im gonna be going with both rear tires spinning.

Scooter, I was in the same boat you were in many, many years and I am still taking care of my Mom even though I no longer live in her house....LOL It might seem to be a bother and a hinderance to you right now but you will be glad that you did it in your later years. It proves how good a son your are and that you are giving half your check to them shows that you are obedient and respectful even though all you want to do is run for the hills. Just hang in there and the only advice I can give you is grin and bear it. Your parents are not going to live forever and enjoy their company and their advice. It will come useful to you when you get much older.
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juantoo3
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being Chinese New Year we had family and friends over for a big supper...after spending the morning up on a ladder painting the south end of the house!
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